She can confidently say that for the first time, there has been a tangible and significant shift in the Hastings community’s attitude toward violence against women and children.

There are now real conversations happening between men and their boys, on sports fields and in workplaces acknowledging that cultures of violence and gender inequity exist and the time for change has arrived.

As service delivery manager at Hastings Domestic and Family Violence Support Service (HDFVSS) in Port Macquarie, Kylie will be the first to say the shift has been a community effort.

When Rosie Batty was named Australian of the Year in 2015 in the aftermath of her son’s incomprehensible death at the hands of a violent father, a nation woke up.

Her son’s legacy is now the driving force behind what is an unstoppable campaign to end the scourge of violence across this country, to change the behaviours that feed fear and to raise a new generation empowered to make a difference.

For Kylie and her team, the names and faces of the 77 women killed as a result of domestic violence this year alone, must mean something. 

“Our focus is improving the safety of women and children – always has been.  I’m really proud that our team continues to build on our relationship with community,” Kylie said.

“It’s important we deliver services in a way that earn respect and trust.”

On the frontline, the team’s primary focus is to ensure women and their children are safe, connected to the right support services and are supported and empowered to reclaim control of their lives.

This year, the work of the HDFVSS shone bright when they issued a challenge to the Hastings community to ‘stickyourneckout’ and expose the ingrained attitudes at the foundation of the cultural acceptance of violence.

The Stick Your Neck Out Sporting Round in July put the Hastings at the forefront of a nationwide campaign bringing all sporting codes together to deliver the message of change and raise awareness about what constitutes violent and intimidating behaviour.

It’s sharing those defining moments and important messages with our children that will make the long-term difference.

“There were a few inspiring people and events that got me started on this path,” Kylie said.

“My grandmother for one who insisted the only time I should look down on someone was to help them up.  In many ways, I suppose I always barracked for the underdog and it’s more than likely this influenced my work choices. 

“Anyone abusing power and using it to coerce or control others stokes the fire in my belly. 

“Reminding women of their own worth – it’s kind of like untangling a web around them.  Suddenly, the light gets in.”

Many of the women and children the service has supported, and who have now become friends of Kylie and her team, joined 500 walkers in November for the annual White Ribbon Coastal Walk. It was the culmination of 12 months of hard work to put domestic violence and its impacts on each and every one of us on the table.

“Central to change is the community wanting it to be different, wanting women and children to be safe strongly enough to expect it – we can’t impose change on anyone,” she said.

“I believe we are leading the way as a community, there is a level of investment I’m not aware of elsewhere.

“I hope that first and foremost, we make a difference for women and children on an individual level, where we free perceptions of “if she didn’t like it, she’d leave” or other burdens that get in the way of speaking up like “I’d never put up with that”.

“I’d also like to think we are carving new ways forward through our many programs, including providing programs for men to meet shame and regret head on and take responsibility for their actions and choices.

 “Some of our team members have been at this a long time – we notice the shift in language and attitudes from previous decades.  As a community we place responsibility where it belongs for the most part – this is not common in many other areas.”

For Kylie, the hard work has only just begun. For real change to occur, it will require a sustained commitment at every level.

And what does she hope we will achieve 10 years from now?

“Gender equity achievable in 10 years?  As a community, I look forward to giving it a red hot go to see how close we can get.”

Read more inspiring stories about the region's 'Movers, Shakes, Risk Takers' the latest edition of Mid North Coast Now. Just click here for the online version or drop in to the Port Macquarie News office for your free copy.