He has died.

And come back to life.

He is happily married to Jenny for nearly 40 years and fiercely proud of his two "high-achieving" daughters Liz and Kate.

The community would know him best as the former general manager of Port Macquarie-Hastings Council.

He was controversially sacked by councillors in 2014.

So what has Mr Hayward learnt in 65 years?

Tony Hayward was born in Murwillumbah, the third of four children.

His father was a bank manager.

An understanding of money and the importance of saving was developed at an early age.

"I remember being 13 and there would be a knock on the door of our home and there would be a man who inevitably would be saying to my dad, 'Can you give me an advance because I've put my whole pay in the poker machine and I don't want to tell my wife'," he said.

Mr Hayward studied business at university in Sydney and met his wife Jenny aged 25 in the carpark at Chatswood train station.

"We used to fight for the same car spot every day," he said laughing.

"It was the ideal car spot because nobody could park you in and you were unlikely to get a ding in your car.

"I remember thinking she was pretty and neatly dressed and her car was looked after so she was someone who cared for things."

After a couple of months Mr Hayward plucked up the courage to initiate contact.

"I left a card on her car windscreen Christmas 1978, written something along the lines of, 'To the owner of the number plate from number plate, have a great Christmas'".

When he returned from a holiday in Port Macquarie he was mortified.

"I thought it probably wasn't the smartest thing to do because what happens if she has a boyfriend who is six foot six who asks me what do I think I am doing?"

So he made the logical decision to switch train stations to Artarmon.

When it became a nuisance to travel that extra distance to Artarmon he went back to Chatswood station but studiously avoided the woman who would later become his wife.

For her part, Jenny was confused at why the "lovely young man who had given her a Christmas card which she had excitedly showed her parents" was so distant.

But Mr Hayward could only ignore her for so long.

"One day I happened to walk past her going to the train station and I thought well I better say hello and it went from there."

They were married after eight months of that meeting.

He counts "finding his wife" as one of the highlights of his life.

Soon the couple will celebrate 40 years of marriage.

Why has the marriage lasted?

"We discuss everything and come to agreement especially on the big decisions," he said.

"We also know that each of us are not perfect."

The couple moved to Gosford when they first married before moving to a number of regional areas in NSW and QLD where Mr Hayward worked for council.

"It is great to be able to help the community and deliver outcomes, council employees are members of the community too and they aspire to have playgrounds, libraries and so forth," he said.

To be general manager of a council became a lifelong pursuit.

"When I was younger my grandparents were best friends with a couple and the husband was the town clerk (general manager) at the council and he had a really nice house, really nice car and he was really respected in the town and he seemed to have a really cool life," he said.

In fact, when Mr Hayward left school he sent off over 50 job applications to work at various councils without any luck.

But he was determined to achieve his goal.

"I think in life it is important to have goals," Mr Hayward said.

"You need to have goals in life and you need to work out if those goals are realistic and then you need to work out how can I achieve those goals."

"I aspired to something and I got it."

He described his sacking as general manager from Port Macquarie-Hastings Council as "hurtful" but did not dwell on it.

"If I kept dwelling on it, it would churn away at me."

He learnt from the experience to "be careful who you place your trust in" .

He advises young people to "have faith" that things will work out.

"Everything happens for a reason you realise," he said.

"I am an honest believer that sometimes you wonder why you are where you are because work or life may be difficult.

"But then inevitably something happens that confirms why you are there."

His strong Catholic faith has sustained him through difficult times.

In 2017 Mr Hayward suffered a cardiac arrest on the golf course in Port Macquarie.

He literally died for several minutes before being resuscitated.

Is there anything out there?

Mr Hayward didn't see much, but a heart surgeon told him the brain "doesn't die" until much later, some three to four minutes after the heart stops beating.

He bemoans the lack of teaching on "financial literacy" for young people

And readily acknowledges it is a tougher world today to grow up in.

The retired golf tragic believes he has had a "really good life" and is looking forward to the next stage.

As for his life motto?

"If you stick with something it is amazing what you can achieve in your life," he said.

The Port News new series is called In My Life. We meet people of the Hastings and ask them what they have learnt in their lives. If you have a suggestion for the series email carla.mascarenhas@portnews.com.au